Hopefully, this is the start of a trend. Family members of turds who came in second in a gun battle with police have been getting a pretty good payoff by bringing suit against the law enforcement agency. Many agencies settle out of hand, convinced that they can’t win. In Florida, a family decided to play the “Ghetto Lottery.“Jury-awards-family-four-dollars-wrongful-death-suit-cops/

It’s good to see that the newspaper is up and running after the fire.  I guess their “Morgue” of newspaper files burned because the paper was unable to rely on reports of the original incident. Readers were forced to rely on their own memory of events or this blurb: The investigation concluded that Hill had pulled a gun on the Sheriff’s Deputies and was heavily intoxicated. They found the gun on him. That was apparently enough to justify the decision not to prosecute and the whole thing should have ended there.

A newspaper that can’t be bothered to consult their own files is being dishonest. When a rock ’em, sock ’em fact-filled story suddenly goes vague, it usually means the facts stopped fitting the narrative. Same thing when questions suddenly fall out of sequence or don’t logically get asked. They got asked, just not answered in a manner pleasing to the writer.

At any rate, how these things usually go, the foreman of the jury has a preprinted form with checkmarks and fill in the blanks. The foreman gives the form to the Clerk when instructed to do so by the judge. The judge reviews the form, hands it back to the clerk. The clerk is then instructed by the judge to publish the verdict (read) to the courtroom. The tension mounts. At least with Publisher’s Clearinghouse the truck parked out front, the camera crew, the quasi-recognizable kinda celebrity and the clown waving the oversized envelope give even the stupidest a hint of things to come. In court, you get the gal with the beehive hairdo and bad attitude. “In the latest Ghetto Lottery case” the jury finds for the plaintiff. Plaintiff, who that, us or them? And awards the deceased immediate family one dollar a piece.

Shee-it won’t even pay for the party hats. I know let’s sue the jury, they stole our money!