Making the rounds on U-tube is a video where good old dad has got his son hitched up to a Corvette with some dental floss, in order to pull a tooth, father-son-corvette-loose-tooth-video.  4, 3, 2, 1, CHILD ABUSE!

What these erstwhile Spielberg’s have never learned is that the actual event is over too soon and not worth the effort, to be good cinema.  Imagine if Hitchcock had filmed this event.  He knew that the drama was in the anticipation of the moment that the tooth was pulled.

Hitchcock would have focused on the planning.  How much string was enough?  Should he tie the kid to a lamp post?  Is the Corvette good enough to do it? Throw in a false start or two and the end result would be at least as good as Geraldo’s, “Al Capone’s Empty Basement”.

I recall the thread, the tooth and door knob.  By the time the old man got through fucking with me, he didn’t need a Corvette.  What I don’t remember is the moment the tooth and I parted company, it was over too soon.