Traffic enforcement is very important it gives really stupid cops something to do. Police in Oklahoma tried to stop an idiot for a traffic violation, he didn’t stop and ran home.  Once home, he jumped out of the car and ran in the house.  HERE IS A CLUE GUYS, YOU CAN PROBABLY FIND HIM AGAIN.  Look under the bed.

Noooooo, they continue the pursuit and kick in the door and find him in the living room with his hands up.  Just to be sure they leave no base uncovered, camera working? Check.  They taze an unresisting suspect. At this point certain that the police Chief’s day isn’t entirely ruined these heros order the suspect’s mother not to interfere and move to a neutral corner.  Forty seconds later they  pepper spray her: Oklahoma-police-confront-pepper-spray-an-84-year-old-black-woman.  

I have participated in the execution of 3000 narcotic search warrants.  We had a saying, “Six to sixty, blind, cripple or crazy they all go down,” meaning everybody goes to the floor and is handcuffed.  We pretty much held to that. We had enough brains to see any attempt at compliance as a good faith effort to comply and would intervene to make sure that the spirit of the rule was maintained.  Sometimes it meant moving granny from one chair, that hadn’t been searched to another that had.

Once in a great while we would run into a situation where one size fits all doesn’t seem appropriate. We once interrupted a birthday party with four or five four year old girls and three extremely pregnant mothers, how we got out of there without playing midwife, I’ll never know.  The door came down, we rushed in, yelled at everybody to hit the floor, one little girl pointed out that it wasn’t a costume party. Another of my terrorists yelled “Simon Says” and the girls went down. About this time the Dominos guy showed up with pizzas.  You’re damn right I bought the pizzas and we threw in a rousing chorus of happy birthday to the guest of honor. We also took three ounces of cocaine away from her daddy.