Used To Be

How times have changed!

I don’t think that I have ever bought a Sports Illustrated. I have never read an article in SI. The only issue I ever looked at was the swim suit issue. I didn’t go out of my way to do that. From the press hype, the 2020 swim suit issue has removed any incentive for me to pick it up.

Gone are Cheryl Tiegs, Christi Brinkley, and Elle Macpherson. They have been replaced by a fat girl, a chick with a dick and a bikini wearing geriatric. Just imagine the conversation in the dressing room of the 2020 SI swim suit photo shoot.

Who could imagine such gems as: “Bring me the paint roller, we gotta grease up the fat girl.” Excuse me dear, but do you dress right?” Or this, “By God! They do make thong Depends!”

Call me old fashioned. The chick with a dick may have a pretty face. However, I know that when a chick is hung better than me, she’s no lady. If I wanted to see fat girls in a bikini, I would go to local pool. As for geriatrics in a bikini, I’m 67 years old. I’ve seen myself naked. I don’t want to see anybody else my age naked.

Taken alone it would be easy to condemn SI as being a mere shadow of its former self. That would be untrue. With recent rule changes, the NFL has turned into touch football. Next think you know MLB will ban players scratching themselves and spitting. Wait, I’m pretty sure spitting has been banned. Chinese Virus, doncha know? FIFA World Cup ceremonies recognize the best team. There is a separate category for best actor for faked injuries. The point is that silly shit seems to be taking root across a wide spectrum of the sports world.

This is as close as I come on the LGBT front.