Now Champ you have won the Gold Medal in the Modern Decathlon and you hold the World record for the past three years. What’s Next?

I don’t know, maybe get my picture on a box of Wheaties. You know I’m just a dumb jock with not a whole lot on the ball. I guess I could marry wealthy.

Where do you see yourself 40 years from now?

Shucks Howard, I don’t know.

My crystal ball says you’re not done. In fact, in the next Century, people will have forgotten your exploits on the track and field and you will be known far and wide for something entirely different.

Tell me more!

When you get to your mid-sixties you decide that you don’t want to be a man anymore. So you have your balls cut off, grow a pair of tits, pluck your eyebrows and shave your legs and tell everybody to call you Caitland. By the way, you are no kinda catch as a woman.

You are one sick bastard, Cosell.

Least I still stand-up to Piss. There you have it folks track and field is for sissies football is for real men. Next week I interview a real man Jerry Smith. The two-time Pro Bowl tight end played for the Washington Redskins from 1965 to 1977, retired with 60 touchdown receptions, which established a record that stood for 27 years.