Season’s Greetings

Despite what my friends say, I don’t really set out to piss people off, but it is a gift.  I try to use it judiciously.  With the Christmas season upon us I have to be on my guard.  I am not enthused with, “Happy Holidays” or Season’s Greetings”.  I’m a big boy, if somebody wants to wish me Happy Hanukkah or Merry Kwanzaa, I take it in the spirit that was intended.  The fact that I celebrate neither holiday is neither here nor there.  I appreciate the sentiment expressed.

I was on the telephone the other day speaking with a woman located in the People’s Republic of Austin.  I should have know better but I got carried away with the spirit of the season.  As the conversation drew to a close I wished her a “Merry Christmas”.  To which she replied,”I find that offensive.” Everybody says I should have hung up right there and then. But of course I didn’t.

Having been in public service all of my adult life, it immediately came to mind that this individual lacked a sense of proportion.  Sometimes it is best to ignore things and other times one must make a stand.  I know you’re gonna accuse the pot of calling the kettle black.  At any rate I replied, “Oh yeah, how do you feel about fuck you?” On the offensive scale she now had a basis for comparison. My lesson for the day delivered, I concluded the conversation.