When my fellow dinosaurs arrived at show up for shift change, most of us were wearing our class “A” uniforms. AS the 80’s  rolled around departments started outfitting officers in nylon gun belts instead of the traditional leather. Pullover shirts with silk screen “Police” followed followed by, god forbid shorts. The 90’s gave way to tactical gear and pretty soon you couldn’t tell the difference between cops and plumbers.

Hint: Cops that require tactical clothing do not require it in size xxxL, plumbers do. With the degradation of the uniform came a corresponding degradation in police performance. Gone were the risk takers of yesteryear. I miss them.

I saw this picture and thought, Eureka! Kilts! could be the savior of American law enforcement. There is a long affiliation of the Scots/Irish in American policing. The pride of wearing a kilt is already there. As any Scotsman will tell you, “Nothing is worn under a kilt, just well used.” This is consistent with American policing traditions of going for the glory or blow jobs. With a kilt you can bedazzle bad guys and bystanders at the same time, as you wrestle that drunk to the ground.

American Cops unite, “Let those brass balls of the past clang clearly unmuffled by cheap polyester, take back your heritage, do it for the blow jobs.”