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Getting The Christmas Spirit

There are many ways of getting into the spirit of Christmas. There are traditional Christmas songs on the radio. This year the list of songs is shorter. “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer,” is racist. “Baby It’s Cold Outside,” sanctions rape. Wait for it, “I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus,” will probably be deconstructed to sanction sexual quid pro quo in exchange for presents.

Oh well, there are always decorations, inside and out. Even here there are some dos and don’ts. What follows are some observations regarding each.

Christmas only comes once a year. The Christmas reveler will face many challengers, both good and bad. 

Don’t let the bastards wear you down kid

Preparation

Make sure the way is clear for Santa Claus
Lights are always festive
Palm trees are probably not the best choice for Christmas lights.
More isn’t better
The holiday season, is shared with other cultures.

Decorations

Pets like Christmas trees. Here is a creative method for keeping the pets away from the tree.

The least of  your problems.

It will never dry out in this house.
When searching for decorating ideas, think outside the box! Needs mistletoe.

Trip to Santa

That time when reality and fantasy conflict.
A trip to Santa can be scary for younger children
Christmas at the mall can be stressful.

I hope this presentation has been helpful. For all those childless Aunts and Uncles out there shopping for nieces and nephews remember my guidelines. Lots of batteries, many parts, loud and some assembly required, makes for a memorable Christmas.

Stay tuned for the next installment of the Christmas Spirit!